Trying butt pads was the most humiliating experience of my life

The Kardashian kin is celebrated for their assets, but it appears the loot gene skipped over Kylie Jenner, who recently Instagrammed a photograph of herself wearing Spanx with built-in pads on the target .
But don ’ t be thus flying to judge. I myself have gotten extra aid in that department .
My trinidadian beget was tired of hearing me constantly complain about being plagued with the no-ass syndrome .
then to make me feel good, she came dwelling with an unusual leverage a few years ago.

“ Shara, I have something for you ! ” she announced .
As I excitedly ripped open the shopping bag she brought from a local Flatbush storehouse, my eyes grew in astonishment. It was a pair of bootleg underwear with two big pads on the back, along with side hep coverage to give the magic trick of equal soundbox symmetry. I couldn ’ t believe something like this exist !
After trying on a few clothing options with my newly acquired big loot, I was hooked. Simply slipping them on over my underwear, I wore those pads everywhere for three months directly — to work, the hair salon, the grocery store memory, even to the corner launderette .
then something tragic happened that ended my life as a sexy video recording vixen ( well, at least that ’ s how I saw myself ) .
One Saturday night I went to a club in Manhattan with my girlfriend. I confidently walked to the front — skipping all the women who hadn ’ metric ton learned my little secret, because girls with bad butts don ’ t have to wait on line .
We were quickly usher inside. Guys shouted, “ Damn, massachusetts ! ” and “ Can you save me a dance ? ” as I sashayed my way through a metallic detector. Thinking nothing of it, I danced to the rap beat and walked veracious in .
then it happened. .. I had wholly forgotten about the female security guard who had to pat down women for weapons !

I broke into a perspiration as I slowly raised my hands and spread my arms and legs to be searched .
After three squeezes, her chew dropped as she looked up at me in talk confusion and asked, “ What is this ? ”
not able to think of a justifiable answer, I barely told her the truth. “ I am wearing butt pads. Please do not say anything. ”
She rolled her eyes and waved me through. As I disgracefully walked away, I turned to see her telling a colleague about my secret. As they looked at me and laughed, three more employees joined their conversation .

After that night, I never wore target pads again .

My girlfriend asked, “ What took her so farseeing ? Why was she feeling you up like that ? ” I lied and said, “ Girl, she tripping. She said I was cunning and asked me for my call number. ”

When I got family, I told my ma what happened, thinking she would give me comfort as only a love mother could .
“ I told you, you got besides damn comfortable with that thing, ” she said, rolling on the shock with boisterous laughter, only to get up and retell the story to my sister over the call .
After that night, I never wore target pads again .

reservoir :
Category : Fashion

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *